A f u t i l e

eye and i

i am a nut
and you?
i am a tree
and you?
i am an earth
and you?

i am a mirror
and you?
i am a story
and you?
i am an eye
and you?

you me
me you
it is such a small world, i tell you!

-junuka

...shot again

Mumbai...
That says it all
Some dream of Shanghai
Some dream of bread
The city of dreams
mine,yours,theirs,ours.

The film interacts with the slums of Mumbai.The city practically runs on slums.Approximately 50 % of Mumbai's population lives in the slums.Dream of Shanghai evicted thousands of lives.
What do people have to say?
The film addresses the complex interdependence of people and the city. The labor and the prosperity.It was shot over a period of time with NAPM, Mumbai and is used widely for the campaign.

...shot

eyes

hers,mine,camera's

voice

hers,mine,camera's

space

ours.

moving with us.the universe.

These are the film stills from a documentary, 'moseti' i made in 2005 with Bhasha and Aadivaasi Academy in the interiors of Gujrat.Ajmiben belongs to a community called Dungra bheels who live in the hills. The film made me find that humanscape exists whether or not your film 'captures' it.So filmmaking is not a magical solution to solve the worldly matters.Rather the world exists because it's all so unsolved!

again, to the webmaker

webmaker webmaker,
do you ever get bored?
making webs,
making the whole...?

(untitled, drawing ink and poster paint on paper,8X8")

Cease...

Wanted to stop

Wanted to block Wanted to cease Wanted to choke

Wanted to run Again.

Wanted it to sleep Wanted it to burn down

Wanted to see it

Floating with the fume

Nothing happened.

A f u t i l e s

Nothing in this world is futile...

it is all very simple

you know the difference,
between
understanding something
and
a 'realisation'
right?

when i realised
sometime back
that
it is completely futile
absolutely
wholly
totally
fully
entirely
futile

Everything,
all of it,
the whole of it,
the entire thing
is futile...

mind you,
i (almost) always knew it,
but that was a 'realisation'

and now
am the 'realised' one
Let me tell you something i know
Nothing in this world is futile,really.

am telling you,
the life is beautiful
the life is wonderful
the life is intense
the life is meaningful
the life is full
the life is lively
the life is lovely

and that's how
am living it...

simply
because
i seek beauty
i create wonders
i make life intense
i give meaning
i make life full
i live life
i love life

but guess what?
you taught me all this,
you pushed me to 'realisation'

but i just wonder
why did it not occur to you?

over and out...

(black ink on handmade paper)

resolutions are something.
they are not meant for resolving
the blog was a resolution

(not crying was
not combing hair was
not making mistakes was
not going bankrupt was
not remembering old stuff was)
so for a while now, i am over and out.
away in search of some more resolutions.

Do stay tuned to twoinsomnias !

Maya Jagi 2

Maya Jagi 1

...,er,est

hot,hotter,hottest
stiff, stiffer, stiffest
windy, windier, windiest .

and I saw the greenest leaf ever .just for one second or may be three.It passed by.I looked at it to make a face .But it looked to smile.
When eyes vanished and some flaming petals from the summer remained up on the tree, two things happened.

It rained and all was out.
and wading though it my bike got punctured...
...,er,est!

nothing else i know better than myself

Though a self portrait,now seems like it was someone else then..!

My beloved, the marketplace

An insect comes flying to this screen and dies at the light.
The marketplace blinks an eye, removes it.

The marketplace is full of things.
People Noise Sound
Trains on tracks, moving up-down
Wet dripping red tomatoes
and pink tearing onions...

The marketplace is full of jumbles.
Faces Cups Food Tables
bhelbatatashevpuripaanidahiragda
Slurpy curries, hot and sour soups and noodles
and the cold coffee...

The marketplace has some special peoples.
Talking quiet loving staring selling buying
red shirts, yellow skirts, flowery lungis, blue jeans, hunter shoes, black bagpacks
and earrings...

The marketplace I tell you, is a place I visit often.
or it visits me...
or stays inside me...
or floats around wherever i go...

My beloved, the marketplace.

am I seeing it?

(Am I seeing it-1, ink on A4 paper)

(Am I seeing it-2, ink on A4 paper)

(Am I seeing it-3, ink on A4 paper)

(Am I seeing it-4, ink on A4 paper)

(Am I seeing it-5, ink on A4 paper)

(Am I seeing it-6, ink on A4 paper)

chirag-e-toor jalao...

the place where

turbulence lives

and feathers of peace float

Mountains

Cold

Trapped

Refuged

In my arms I see

two clouds.

One of my own darkness

Another, of flowing water from the other side of the mountain.

Chirag-e-toor jalao by Mehdi Hasan

Dharamshala diary

The pair of feet

The tree stands dripping in rain
I stand under,wet.
Looking up at the sky through the leaves,
drops fall down straight in me
(I wonder if they become tears?)
I remember the other day
and yet another
and then yet another
I think of all the rains gone by
and try to think of this new one.

and I see
The pair of feet...
sitting inside a mound of plastic sheet
and a hand wiping water around the pair of feet.
On a pink piece of carpet, sit shiny toe rings,red saree and sound of glass bangles.
and I see then
an entire home around the pair of feet.

I remember temples
and the pair of feet
ready to be touched,standing.

-ka

Child with bringles

(mixed media on paper)

Katchal, an island

E-wall, the village

Smelling burnt wood

Jacky ,the dog

Ashwini, the child

Clamentine, the friend

Me , the lost

and

found here...!

ते गेले तेंव्हा

सगळा वाराच थांबलाय
आवाज बंद झालेयत

पण भोंगे वाजातायत
दुकाने झग्मग्तायत
एसी चे झोत सोडतायत
सुंदर मुली गाणी गातायत
सुंदर मुले प्रचंड आनंदाने हसतायत
लाल इमारतींमधे खा-प्यायला वारेमाप आहे
अतोनात जागा आहे झोपायला...

ते गेलेत पण .
ते गेलेले आहेत.

आणि गल्लोगल्लीचे घाशिराम घाम पुसत घरी निघलेत.

Just like that

the new age rhyme

(with spanish guitar playing at the back..and janis joplinish voice singing)

There is a person called life sitting somewhere

hahaha
it laughs a lot
it travels a lot
it sleeps a lot
and yes, eats a lot.
it keeps laughing at all we do

and when it snores and burps and farts
dreams happen

lalala hahaha
I love the person called life

Vaara

Susaat vaara
Paala pachoLa
PivaLa goLa
Jatach nahi astaala.

the webmaker

(portblair house,ink on handmade paper)

webmaker webmaker

where are you?

On the window

or

the wall

Making a web

or

about to fall?

Red t-shirt

(mixed media on paper on a drawing pad)

to the webmaker

i stay up

coz i sleep

i sleep

coz i stay up

what do you do?

things under the light..

Bridge on the waters

(mixed media on paper)
These are from a series on Ahmadabad, a city where I studied for 5 years.It is full of colour,vibrance and noise as an image but carries a strange lull of cultural silence during the recent times. This work in its essence carries the experiences of my interactions with the city in relation to the process of self exploration.

without realising

2X3,mixed media on paper

With smell come memories and with memories by the beach some drawings.

Smell

i want a noseful of damp air

and that green smell

and the smell of fish

and your voice...breez.

the smell of deep grey

and the cold sand

my heart sits in a blue boat

and floats out there,in that deep grey

and it smells of that...day.

i want.

-junuka

This is not what i was saying

against deadlines...

Probably dreaming against the 'deadlines'

one of those days

WHEN I DO NOTHING

BUT FEEL EVERYTHING AND ALL

STARING AT MY DESK AND THE BROWN WALL

Just one of those days...

Laagi Tum se Preet

Marubihaag today.
Shredding sorrow
(or restlessness?)
into fine gentle pieces,
moving around my matter
like dust in the sun...
-Junuka



Bandish
Laagi Tumse preet
piharava
nisdin mora jiya rahe
udaas...
Begi aavo darashan deejo
asuvan zarat boondan boond