26 Down

duritanche timir jaavo
vishwa swadharma soorye paho
jo, je vaanchheel to te laho
pranijaat...
-Pasayadaan,Sant Dynaneshwar

down the dump with myself
when i see the bottom of the dump
i realise dump has no connection with its bottom.
bottom just carries.it suffers but it holds.
and is indifferent.

26 years:how many bottoms does one see?

down with self
i lay peacefully
the bottom lets me be
and the dump flies away.

off

Switch it all off,i say

but will i reach the switch..?
will anyone reach the switch..?

by the way where is the switch..?

when some hands think

(mixed media on paper8X5)

kon guru ani kon shishya

Sadguruvachoni Sapadel Soy

Vinda Karandikar is a legend of marathi literature. On the occasion of Gurupournima i happen to bump into one of his great works...

he mazya sarva mitra-maitrini, shishya,gurunsathi...
tumchi khup athvan nehmich yete.aaj ajun prakarshane ali.

na daro rang mope...

Today we sang a new bandish in bageshree.
unique.direct.perfect.clear.
Sensual, Sexual, Smoothly flowing.
Radha talking to Krishna through every note, every matra,every word of the bandish and through every particle of her body.
The bandish runs really fast. drut-lay.full of energy.
as i sang i realised i was feeling the feeling.at least i was supposed to feel the feeling.

metaphors,contexts,spaces.a total mixmatch.i try to be one with it.i try to be one with myself.i only try.
It hits me .

I often wonder what were they like as people the Krishna and the Radha , who gave freedom to so many emotions of love, attraction,gaze, sex, touch and yes, a celebration of it all.

I often also wonder what were Adam and Eave like,as people?
Did they ever sing?what was it like,then?

na daro rang mope
tang vasan ang ang
pragat hot brijvaasi dekhat sab!

kaisi na tohe laaj aave
niharat jobanva mora
beech dagar gher let
mose chhed karat sab!

na daro rang mope...

Night

Illustrations for a children's book about night in the forest. I had put some here long ago...Here are some new ones!

gone with the sun

(poster colour on sketchbookpaper,2008)

Pages from HIV Campaign

Prayas,an organization works diligently for years on HIV and related issues.These are some posters from the series of posters made for them.This was also supposed to be a small book.It was a challenging experience to put information and complex social scenario surrounding HIV AIDS with brightness and visual interest.The bright yellow was inspired by STD booths and truck graphics!

Stare.

"Stare.
It is the way
to educate
your eye,
and more.

stare,pry,
listen,and
eavesdrop.
Die knowing
something

You are not
here long"

by Walker Evans
from 'The art of looking sideways'

aage aage

(mixed media on paper,8X6",2008)

mein tha jiske peechhe peechhe
ab mein uske aage aage
dekha jab mein aage peechhe
dekha sab kuchh aage aage!

Kumar Gandharva
(in context of his work and music)

a man called mukul shivaputra

he is a sound
forget music
he is the whole
he runs down the blood
forget music
he is a rock
the sound of stones

got to hear a new Bageshree. completely different.all opposing.all beyond music.
he is an addiction for a high forever.
i am only tripping.

i want to chase him.

game

lonE onlY alonE lonelY
let us play a game of es and ys

e y e
y e y
e e y
y e e
y y e

face to face

webmaker webmaker,
where are you lost?
looking for a face
or
wondering which one to cast?

face

(junuka,2008, ink on handmade paper)

my face,when i see it in pieces.

in retrospect

(i am just back from Ahmedabad,after taking a documentary workshop with 4th yr GDPD.just thought should not deprive my blog from some of the new found musings.hey, beware my students!you are not allowed to feel flattered.it is not because of you all.you were a bunch of pains in the ***!):)

i had never reached Ahmedabad in a plane, ever, in past so many years. i am used to getting off at the railway station, bargaining with autowalla and reaching NID. i would feel full in my heart approaching from the other side of the bridge seeing red brick structures hidden in green on the other side of the Sabarmati. It always felt that i was reaching home. But this time i reached looking from top, smoothly landed, got into a car and looked at Ahmedabad. The old city, Relief road, Elis bridge all looked very different. i felt like a stranger in my own home. i wanted to get off and start walking.

Unsettled as hell i was thinking what am i going to teach? What can a struggler teach? The one who is herself finding where she is going. Series of questions hovered around my head as the car entered the gate and i got off. The security bhai came in front and said, “arrey tum aa gayi?faculty ban ke?”

The earth shook under my feet. Now everything is from a different point of view,i realized and hid myself in the guest room like a stranger guest, wishing i had refused to come. It was all poking me to bring up issues i had stopped confronting and buried deep down my soul but there was no way back now.

So this is how it was.it sounds like making love..in a stormy love affair.i lost and found myself at the same time.

Anxiety wounded me
was dead
was buried

Messed around...

new life, flowered
Blooming

head full of 1621 violins

heart full of 2356 colours

jumped,thumped,ran,fell, went cautious
loved.

Here on i am staying away from nostalgia.Life is going to be straight,looking ahead!i have outgrown, i felt.i missed Pune which i never missed before.and i dont miss ahmedabad anymore,i only manage to remember it.i remember writing to a friend before leaving for ahmedabad, about my own attachment with the place and therefore a feeling of stressful fear to go back and teach.but i guess this goes on.

yes and i enjoyed teaching.

more to come...stay tuned..as you can see, two insomnias is just kicking!

How you turn things upside down, as if the potter ranked no higher than the clay!
Shall the thing made, say of its maker, "He did not make me"?
Shall the pot say of the potter,
"He has no skill"?

-Isaiah 29:16

i found this here in the library,in NID, the place i am in right now.About to leave, after completing a full circle..of being here as a student..now as a teacher.It has been a great great mad bike ride! This is where it all starts, actually.

A f u t i l e

eye and i

i am a nut
and you?
i am a tree
and you?
i am an earth
and you?

i am a mirror
and you?
i am a story
and you?
i am an eye
and you?

you me
me you
it is such a small world, i tell you!

-junuka

...shot again

Mumbai...
That says it all
Some dream of Shanghai
Some dream of bread
The city of dreams
mine,yours,theirs,ours.

The film interacts with the slums of Mumbai.The city practically runs on slums.Approximately 50 % of Mumbai's population lives in the slums.Dream of Shanghai evicted thousands of lives.
What do people have to say?
The film addresses the complex interdependence of people and the city. The labor and the prosperity.It was shot over a period of time with NAPM, Mumbai and is used widely for the campaign.

...shot

eyes

hers,mine,camera's

voice

hers,mine,camera's

space

ours.

moving with us.the universe.

These are the film stills from a documentary, 'moseti' i made in 2005 with Bhasha and Aadivaasi Academy in the interiors of Gujrat.Ajmiben belongs to a community called Dungra bheels who live in the hills. The film made me find that humanscape exists whether or not your film 'captures' it.So filmmaking is not a magical solution to solve the worldly matters.Rather the world exists because it's all so unsolved!